Noel likes decorating slightly more than he likes gardening, which is not at all; and less than DIY of any description, though it could be argued that decorating is a subset of DIY so any painting in the garden is a combination of all three and to be avoided at all costs.
But sometimes decorating can’t be avoided, especially after Andy Chimneysweep, accompanied by Andy Stoveman fitted a new flue to our precious wood-burning stove which had been belching black smoke everywhere, including all over the cat, who does insist on getting so close that it singes his whiskers. I should point out here that all the tradesmen we deal with are called Andy, including Andy Logman, Andy Smallholder and Andy Treesurgeon. The Andyness spreads to other suppliers of services, including Andy Frenchteacher.
The Andys warned us there may be mess following the flue fitting, to be fair, there had been a mess before, so we’d already resigned ourselves to the inevitable and even taken advantage of Homebase’s 15 per cent discount to buy the paint in anticipation of D (decoration) Day. Naturally with such a discount it was only fair to spend an extra 15 per cent on plants and half-price pots.
With me out during the day, Noel volunteered to start decorating duties in between his coding and programming duties. OK, so he didn’t volunteer, but he did it anyway.
Now, not that I want to check up on him or anything, but we do have a wireless camera I can control over the interweb, mainly to see the cat. There’s something very restful about watching the cat sleeping, his little furry body sighing as he breathes, ah, bless. Under the pretence of wanting to see the cat, but actually to check painting progress, I logged on. This is what I saw….
I ask you.